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May 27, 2013 - Left Togo and Entered Orland, Indiana, USA

Where is Andy Graham? I am in Orland, Indiana, USA, a small town of 400 people, helping my Dad as he slowly dies from cancer.

It is nice be back in Orland, Indiana. It is a culture I understand, no matter how far away I travel. This is my home.

The Waltons

I returned to the USA to work with family to help Dad. My father is dying from cancer. All hope of a cure is over, and he will die from prostrate cancer that spread to his back. Our family will do our best to allow him die gracefully, painlessly and as happy as possible.

He is happy, even while stubbornly accepting that he needs help to stand, move, eat, drink and enter the toilet.

Death slowly beats on the door, requesting that we accept his decision, and we seem to say, “No, not today.”

And dad hasn't given up hope yet. He says, “I would like a sandwich. And will you please turn on the TV? The White Socks are playing today.”

I am here to help Dad choose the best seat on the bus.

I thank the good Gods,

Andy Graham

John Tadpole

Another strange twist in our lives. I arrived yesterday in Minnesota to be with my mother. Her kidneys are quitting and it is not long. We met with hospice today and she told them she is not ready to quit the medicine so we are in palliative mode. Words I never wanted to know. The cancer got my father three years ago and i got home the day before he died. I am not making that mistake again.

Relax a little and tell us all a little about how Orland and Indiana and the midwest are part of this world.

Keep writing,


John, "palliative mode," never hear them before, but appropriate.

I have faith that all will be OK, and know this, and I am not worried, my Father is a good man.

I will get back into small town USA mode, and explain what is like returning to a world that is quiet, and clean, with a large selection of food.
Life is good.

Phil J

Welcome back to the USA. I am glad you will be able to be with your father. I was only able to be with my father about a month before we lost him. There are so many questions I wish I could have asked him but sometimes could not find the right words. Every day is a precious gift. Great post. I loved it. I will keep you updated on my plans as always.


Welcome home Andy even if the circumstances are not the very best. I suspect you are the type that makes each day, at the least, a good day.
I beat prostate cancer as of this the 5th year but now I'm waiting to hear from tests if I have thyroid cancer. Oh well one of my main mottos is "ever onward".
I have a nice green meadow next to my property and when I wake up I always look out my window, sometimes there are deer in it, and I say very simply, Thank you.
Stay happy and look out your window it's full of what's good.


Watching "True Grit," with Jeff Bridges, each day is a good day. Each day I go for a walk, it is my way of starting each day. My mother and father have true grit, and I am their lucky son. Our family is 3 girls, and 2 boys, and my mother and father, we are lucky. And, as always, I am grateful the good Gods.


My Father died of Cancer and complications from Diabetes some 16 years ago, funny the night he died, I did not get the call from my Sister until the next morning, I woke up at 3 am local time here in El Salvador, and my Dad as I remember him at about age 35 appeared to me, patted me on shoulder and said "Everything is going to be ok". My Dad was honest, he was also an Atheist, raised by a fanatical Evangelical Grandmother in 1920s and 1930s small town USA, after he was 40 or so got depressed, had a younger Sister and Brother, and my Dad drank every night, got nasty, and passed on the dysfunction that had been passed on to him, my Mom was refugee from Europe and a survivor, our family was dysfunctional as can be, yet have forgiven my Dad because my Mom told me 'why'. My Mom and I became 'buddies' after my Dad died, his legs amputated. for a while my Sister told me, my Dad had orderlies smuggling in whisky at the local Hospital! Well, good for him! He worked hard all his life as did my mom, sacrificing in the 1950s and early 1960s so I could go to Catholic private day school in the South instead of the piss poor Public Schools, my Dad moved to Southern States to work as he was a tradesman and despised Labor Unions and so moved to right to work States where one did not have to join a Union to get a job, I got to travel in the early 1970s to Central America, the early 1980s to Europe and finally in 1985 I 'escaped America' divorced, no kids, and ready to reinvent myself. I was luckier than my Dad in some ways, who never got further west than Arkansas, where he worked for then Gov. Winthrop Rockefeller for 4 summers and Bless him he picked a very cosmopolitan tourist town for us to move to in 1950s, hope your Dad turns around and recovers and have always envied you a bit for having a 'functional' and living family, a great gift I believe only a minority of people have. Best of luck.


Welcome back to Indiana - i was with my father in the months he slid towards death - it will be good for your parents and you for you to be there - and you will have peace about in the coming years


I believe we all should have a no-regrets life, therefore if there is a situation that would grant me regrets if I fail to do it, then I do it.

Note, time to put up profile photos.
Thanks Andy

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