100 Percent Sure I Will Lose Weight - Hope for Fat Mans Club #diet #fat
Andy, is this something you have recently understood? How did you get to 205 lbs which you now see as too many lbs for you?
Today I am 200 Pounds. I have controlled my weight for 41 years, I was 175 when I took off traveling, and was 180 when I returned from Africa. my mother was on a mission, a subconscious mission!!! I stopped her mission.
Except when I want off the deep end of alcoholism 30 year ago, so I quit drinking, and eating. I was 225 when I stopped drinking.
When I returned home to visit Mom and Dad during the last 19 years of travel, I would only stay 2 weeks, then leave, 100 percent aware I was like an alcoholic at a wine tasting party. A truly stupid place for a recovering alcoholic, like a Christian Preacher entering a strip club, he or she is not welcome. My parents house is a place where people get fat.
My Father did not want my Mother, or Me to every talk or go on a diet, he just wanted us to be fatter like him. He was happy being fat, providing Mom never left, so her being fat almost guaranteed that.
Now my father is dead. and my mother is OK now, he has been dead for 3 years. She is accepting that Dad is dead, and we cannot change that, she is happy. The last two times I saw her, I sacrificed my weight for her, I was supportive even though it caused me great stress. I allow myself to be in harms way, because my mother need a solid, up front man, no excuses person I am, I am a rock. Yet, I am not a rock when it comes to Butter Pecan ice cream. I avoid it.
People do not get it!!!! She would cook dinner here, put 2 hamburgers on the plate, 2 bake potatoes, and we would sit down to pray. And, she would eat a bowl of tomato soup, and a small salad. I had to tell her, you are making me eat like my Dead Father, you want Dad here at the table, and you have to stop.
People are scared when they see a person like me, I do not accept excuses from myself, I do the right thing. I do not allow people to make me suffer for them, I do not take crap from anyone. I am the giver of hope, either come along and do anything you dream of doing, or leave the room. I do not accept negative people in my world. We do not allow it on the site. I have been laughing, my mother keep says she is dumb, I have taken to stopping her. My Dad was a bull ape, he protected Mom, and their proclivities, and idiosyncracies. He is dead, I do not need to tolerate his control of the household that even Mom did not need.
I share this information because I believe in the light of day, we are only as healthy as the secrets we keep. I keep no secrets. Most people are a bundle of lies, and secrets. I believe in open, honesty, I have the greatest of lives on the planet because I deserve it, I treat people with respect, and throw the non-respectful people out the door.
Dad and Mom were one, as is a marriage and the way a marriage needs to be. I had no right to interrupt their marriage so I could stay thin when I was a guest in their home. Yet, Mom wanted me to be here until after January 31, the day my father died. I have no good excuse to leave, she wants me, and I can share my extreme, powerful force, and strength for her. I do not give up, and she knows this. But, I know that people live lives of quiet desperation, afraid to rock the boat, full of rage, anger, and passive aggressive comments. I put myself on the stage, to prove that honesty can win, and being a strong person is good. That we not need to lie. People must accept others, but there are times when we do not need to accept others. I was wise enough to know to stop my mothers crap. She is great now, she is planning 400 calorie meals. I do not need to leave home to avoid Dad.
Be honest in my world, be open ,and honest of get the hell out of Dodge. I expect the best out of people.
Everyone wants to put only the idea that they are perfect on the table. The person who puts their dirty laundry on table is the stronger person, than the person who sits back making comments. I am a person in the works, getting stronger with each year of my life, while people my age are becoming weak, I become stronger. Why, because I define myself, and fight obey this prayers. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. People are very afraid of honestly, they do not want their secrets to be exposed. Why? People think if you really knew them, you would not love them, they feel unlovable. But Intimacy is being honest, and not apologizing for being imperfect.