Bah arrived in Ghana from Ivory Coast yesterday,
"A day late." (She did not show up the day we agreed.)
"Three hours late." (She did not leave the next day as agreed.)
I am not sure where to start, or what to say, real life is full of small lies that can turn into big lies, and on rare occasions a person learns is an obstruction to love. My friend Bah is on the wrong path, I told her when she arrived,
"I do not want to listen to lies on the telephone."
I do not care if people lie to me, I wait on them, I expect them to lie to me, it is the normal human condition. I just had a chuckle, the Ten Commandments is a list of the ten things humans do on a daily basis, and telling us to stop doing them. These commandments are not the rare issues of humans; they are the normal day-to-day sins of humans.
(Six is not normal.)
I live one day at a time, my first goal is to be a good boy all day, and then after I know I am behaving, maybe I try to do something.
If we have more we will be happy.
Last night Bah says,
"I want a house, I do not want to live in a Hotel."
I can feel the challenge; there is an implied request,
"Make me happy."
I thought about it, and when she wakes up, I will say,
"Go find a furnished one for 150 dollars per month, with no deposit."
The average person in Ghana pays about 30 US Dollars per month for their apartment, if they are not living in their parents homestead. Therefore, I am offering to live five times better than normal, but for half the price of the Hotel.
I am sad, I did a quick inventory of all my friends, I do not have one friend that I believe is content, they want, a never ending list of wants, and this list includes my family.
Ghana, West Africa --- Wednesday, March 23, 2011
I watched the movie "Eat Pray Love," I enjoyed it, my friend Mark had warned me,
"It’s a Chick Movie." (Chic or Chick? Which is correct?)
It was good, it would be entertaining to know the percentage of divorces that could be directly related to married girls watching this movie, I am positive there are many.
il dolce far niente
Eat Pray Love, is generally entertaining, and I have already forgotten most, the only lasting memory I want to keep in long-term memory is this phrase offered up by the movie.
"il dolce far niente."
I would translate:
"The feeling of sweetness experienced, when we can accept that it is ok to do nothing."
I want the USA people include this as one option or choice…
My friend Bill in the USA used to say,
"I am catching up on my nothings."
The Bible says to rest on the seventh day; it does not say we MUST go shopping. The word must, need, have too, etc. are the problem words.
Doing Nothing is the Goal of Andy Graham
I am not sure when I realized this was my goal, I think it was after a friend of my bragged that he worked 14 hours per day for the last month. My sister April said one time,
"We work so we can go play."
"We do not play, so we can go work."
Work is an annoying thing that disrupts my ability to enjoy life, I accept that I need to work, but it is not the most important thing in my day.
Hmm, people work 14 hours per day, I thought to myself,
"Yes, you are very very very stupid, you are not smart, a truly smart person could make a million working two hours per day."
I sometimes think I avoid Americans, they want me to feel guilty for doing nothing, while the underdeveloped countries like Ghana do nothing all day, without a single feeling of guilt. I believe that happiness has little to do with work; it is just the cessation of guilt that allows the remainder to be happy.
Note: The book the 4 Hour Work Week is the analogous book to Eat, Pray, Love, but for men, they both are fantasy based, and unrealistic, a temporary belief, the promise, that an average person can live a dramatic life, at the end both are selling the soap opera.
Hi Andy. I am glad you are safe and sound. You are, as usual, right on the mark about human nature. I had it figured out some years ago. I also do not raise issues that I know are true but which would make others uncomfortable. Most people do not want to hear the truth and would be offended if they knew the real truth. And, as my kid sister told me, some people emotionally cannot handle the truth. They would panic and possibly commit suicide. I just live my life day to day as I want and do not waste time worrying about things I cannot change.
I do see an incredible amount of beauty in life. From a pretty flower, to beautiful music, and beautiful places. I certainly have learned what the source of my happiness is. When you spend years in an environment totally controlled by others and with no possessions of your own except uniforms and a few pictures of loved ones, you learn where happiness starts. You cannot blame a bad day on others. You make the choice about your day. You have to face reality. It starts between your ears. It is an attitude. And the fact that you repeatedly, freely made the choice to put yourself in that time and place means you cannot blame your circumstances on anyone but yourself.
I like to think I am happy. Sometimes a little frustrated, but usually only in passing. I am sure of one thing, I really look forward to your blog and a good cup of coffee in the morning.
Great comments, at over 60, with some minor health issues I must manage, I MUST, eat, bathe, exercise, be aware, especially crossing streets with the crazy drivers talking on cellphones or running red lights, I DO stay in contact with friends since I am gregarious, I show up on time and pay my utility bills on time, since I am not a person who likes living in the dark without water, this week I received long rambling e mail from a woman wishing to relocate in my region, Central American, no full name, no age, no city and town, and no magic word......PLEASE...just 'look into this property for me...is the area 'dangerous', I sent her the Wiki Travel sites, which have all kinds of links and information on Central America and also some common sense advice, including be polite and always use 'please and thank you' when asking for and receiving a favor.especially in Latin America.....last night a long winded e mail from her with a litany of problems and questions, I put the e mail on SPAM too tired to answer, if she e mails again I will put again in SPAM, the best way to get rid of someone you do not desire contact with is to ignore them, in the last months of my marriage, after a terrible verbal fight, my ex wife moved out to the couch, only spoke to me when necessary, it worked for her, she won, and got her divorce, no contest. No kids, so no complications. be aware Andy and try to get at least an hour of 'quiet time' ALONE a day, no BAH, no computers or technology. After 20 minutes on Facebook the other night, I just gave up, I had made a suggestion on a thread, a couple persons did not like it and had asked their 'committee' to take down my posting..told em take it down, have fun!!!! No sense of humor I would be in a rubber room in States somewhere!!!!! lol!
Hey Andy, Im sure you already know this, but if someone says , "Im on my way coming" it translates to what ever time they feel..It could be minutes or days, just as long as they have it in there head they are on there way. Let me know if you need anything. Im in Haatso area of Accra and will be up in Tamale in a month. You can also reach me at 0276787286. I'll be in country until June....Glad your out of Ivory Coast and back in Ghana....