Writing my 200 Newsletter
I am a person that sabotages success, it is part of my alcoholic dysfunctional behavior, no matter what I do, I must accept that it is possible for me to take extreme success and wash it down the drain.
(I have not drank alcohol for 18 years.)
Money is easy to make and easy to lose, not a good measure of success, but the normal world measure.
200 Newsletters, this is not a blog, I have posted on the blog about 2100 times I think about that number. The blog is extremely easy to do, takes little thought and is just a rambling by me.
My newsletter goes out now to about 12,000 person, when I send it, it is becoming increasing difficult to become motivated enough to write, this is because of the blog. I spend my brain on the blog, now it detracts from the newsletter.
Ah, it is not the writing that is difficult, it is the captions on the photos. I despise putting captions under the photos. The camera is now so advance, IF I wanted, I could take and put up 100 pictures per day easily, but I cannot automate the captions that explain the photos. Maybe one day voice recognition and typing of what I say will advance where it is faster than me typing. I have tried the Dragons Speaks Softly and it is annoyingly slow compared to me typing.
I was in Midland, Michigan, in a complete alcoholic haze, sleeping on one the sofas you buy for 25 dollars. Too many beer cans around, half full, full, empty, upside down, never sure when I started one, or finished a can. I tried to not do the fast rush of whiskey because it was dangerously close to making me or anyone think they are invincible. Beer was slower and did make the brain crazy as quick, less like for me to get in trouble. An alcoholic is reasonable, they will work for days and years to protect there ability to have a high.
OK, I was on the couch, the Television was blaring, it does not stop itself, it just continues to make noise. It is hard on the senses, I was passed out, and the noise continued. Please shut up TV, but for sure do not shut off, I need to hear noise, maybe music, anything but my own thoughts, if I listened to my own thoughts to long I would go mad and harm myself. I needed to stop my brain, whether with alcohol or with a movie, or with noise, conversation, anything to avoid being alone with me.
Note, I do not know where I am going with this… hehehe
Ok, I am on the couch, there is one of them documentary, interview the success in business, tell the secret of success in one sentence on TV.
- The job of management is not to manage, it is to remove the obstacles to success. -
Annoying when you hear a profound statement in the middle of a great I feel sorry for myself, why doesn’t someone put me out of my misery epic in your life.
Oops, what a bunch of dirty laundry, everyone will know, I am not a perfect person.
What have I done in the 9-10 years of my travels, what I have done in 200 newsletter, not much really.
I know that all travelers all person that leave the safe havens of home, the comfort of being the same with everyone, are probably running away from something. I once heard, said, or came to know, a person must continue to travel until they know why they are traveling.
I think what I wanted to do by leaving my home, was to find a place or way whereby I did hurt anyone, and mostly myself. I did not want to let anyone down again, I wanted to escape the eyes of my friends when they saw me fail. Remember, I sabotage success, I do not succeed, I go to any lengths to guarantee failure. I do not deserve to succeed.
Someone complimented me on writing sarcasm, I am not sure sarcasm is a good writing technique…
Ok, I do think brutal honesty is.
Something like exposing my insides, making a window for people to see themselves.
Penance for sins, forgive me, forgive others, is difficult,
- the road to salvation is long and narrow, like a razors edge.-
Somerset Maughn from the movie with Bill Murray, called the - Razors Edge. - I guarantee I boshed a lot of that quote and reference… hehehe so sue me.
Maugham, W(illiam) Somerset (1874-1965), English author, whose novels and short stories are characterized by great narrative facility, simplicity of style, and a disillusioned and ironic point of view. Maugham was born in Paris.
Rats, born in Paris, hard keep up the cynical stance on Frenchies.
Look what I discovered free money for travel
Somerset Maugham Award
This literary award in the United Kingdom was created by W. Somerset Maugham in 1947 for young British writers (under the age of 35) to spend on foreign travel. The prize (£3,500 to each winner, equivalent to about $5,700) is awarded annually in May by the Society of Authors.
Ok back to the failure, what maybe I have succeed in doing is living for 9-10 years without doing anything I should keep my mouth shut about for fear of reprisal from the angry voice of righteous indignation, who would wish to say, we are better than you, you are lesser.
I am never sure, could be certifiably crazy, it is the catch 22 of life, the crazy do not believe they are crazy. I person know at one time they put me in a hospital for 30 days. They committed me because I was crazy,
My family and friends are waiting for me to go crazy again, I suppose so am I, but I will delay it until I die.
What are the obstacles to a hobo succeeding… hehehe. A hobo does nothing but survive, nothing more is needed for a hobo to be a success. One meal a day, a place to flop, not to be beat over the head with a broom to get off the doorstep. That is success, to not be beat by someone, to keep the old pride intact, to not give them the happiness of seeing you fail.
I love to annoy the travel writers of the world. I am terrible at grammar, cannot see a sentence fragment if it was hitting me in the face. I think I am dyslexic, I cannot see, feel, or know when I make a mistake, maybe I can feel them, but to correct them is impossible for me, I do not have the God given or maybe he took it away to make me work harder, whatever, the bottom line is I cannot write.
Mastery, I look to be the master of something, I know my self-esteem is contingent upon me being the master of something.
I am the master of hmmm… let me count.
7.5 things, one is only half mastered, these are the things in my life I would say I am an expert.
Writing is not on the list, it is how I make money, but the biggest failure I have ever done.
I have successfully avoided putting captions on the photos I have taken by using the excuse. I am typing a blog post, really I am talking to myself, a sign of crazy persons.
But the line between crazy and something else is on a small precipice, we can jump off and become what we want whenever we wish.
Note, I read the book the Razors Edge, not so simple, better to rent the movie with Bill Murray in it, he is fabulous. I am told he extorted the producers of Ghostbusters 3 into making the movie, by saying, I will do Ghostbusters 3, if you make the movie - The Razors Edge. -
I think I am around the 40 level, I have watched the movie about 40 times, it my all time record for one movie, and I can say, I still cannot figure it out, but I am sure it is profound.
I was off on a thread reading about Somerset Maugham and the Razors Edge, now I am lost. The Encyclopedia talks about the movie, I discovered an article about it, but it is referencing a movie,
- Released in 1946, this drama stars Tyrone Power as Larry Darrell.
Larry Darrel is played by Bill Murray I hope, in a REMAKE, I think, I am never clear, impossible to research from TOGO, I am in the middle of Africa, the internet is there, but I lack the motivation.
Maybe I am completely wrong, another failure, it is a razors edge, and those whom think they are correct, fall off. Humility, I am human, weak, and fragile, I can be destroyed so easily, many time with just a few words. But today, I am a huge success, I can afford to buy a cup of coffee, and I have a fan in my room.
Writing my 200 Newsletter
Voodoo Stealing Testicles
Nothing in life becomes stranger or more complicated dysfunctionally stupid than listening to a person explain, or lack of explaining a story.
There is a man, he just finished the Peace Corp, I think he was in Benin and not Togo, nonetheless, he is in the Galion Hotel, he has completed his two years. He is Mike, I think, lives in Chicago, and will do some convoluted trip into Ghana, up to Burkina Faso, to Mali, then nor sure…
Ok, well, I was drilling the type A personality about Religions of Benin, he is pretty knowledgeable, however the person asking me is always the person controlling the conversation. Well, he is talking about the rations, Islam, Christian and Voodoo or Animalism whatever. I am only wanting to know for my level of enjoyable conversations, and where I can avoid or enter for what.
He said there was a rash of stealing testicle. I am taking him, he is American as the statement. He says that one boy blamed a women for stealing his testicles and in a moment a group came up and almost or did kill the women. I said, or asked,
- How did she steal his Testicle. -
Or something and says,
- Voodoo -
- It is pretty easy to check to see if a person has their testicles. -
He say or alludes to the Voodoo, I am getting this idea, the brain is not able to separate the levels or reality. Testicles or no testicles, that is the question. To associate is to be true. Is to say, he believes in Voodoo.
Now, there is a bleeding, or acceptance of one culture, over your own culture that is natural. A person normally starts to be socialized, and begins to accept some of the superstitions of the country or culture.
I personally will tempt fate, walk under a latter, look for black cats, and all the other crap I hear. I sort of figure, if it is true, then let us get to it. May as well help, rather than avoid superstition.
I think Horror movies is stupid, I never believed in Santa, or the Tooth Fairy, but this man from Peace Corps bring a Fetish out of his pocket. It is to help him win some Fantasy Sports Game in Chicago. He is superstitious, and will pay money to buy some silly thing, not a souvenier, an item to assist him in winning a game or money.
I wonder what it would feel like to have your fate, destiny all determined by something you purchased in a market in Togo. Hmm, I do not believe, have trouble listening, but then again, the weirder the story, the more interesting, and it never ends with some stories. I personally am in MUCH more inclined to believe in a good God, then to believe in a bad God. But I believe the Devil finds more persons or leads more to God than the good, fear of something is more powerful than the love of something, except for 10 percent of the population, then love is more powerful. Fear of losing love, is fear, not love.
Ok, so he is Peace Corps, finished his tour of duty and says, he is
- Chillin -
I asked him what it means when a person needs counseling because of isolation. He said,
- They freak out. -
- What does freak mean? -
He finally let off of it, and said, could be anything from packing the bags and leaving to OCB.
This man was not a good communicator, his type A personality would not allow him to look at me, or talk directly at me, I could not believe how he demanded or commanded my respect and attention. OK, I forced him and drilled him again to tell me FREAK…
OK, I figured it out, he said, OCD, thanks to my Encyclopedia, I knew it by example of him saying the person would continually wash their hands.
P101 Psychology of beginning Psychobabble in University.
What leads a person to use OCD, an Acronym for some obscure ailment, that is nuts.
Someone has been training them or prophesizing the maladies they will develop, therefore guaranteeing they do, and they can label it. I still think buck up, shut up, and grow up, is a great three step program of recovery.
Include a really hard kick.
Ok, Freaking, is always a problem when a young person leaves home, homesick, and the torture of being alone with a person they do not like, do not respect, and do not know could make anyone freak When they have to be with this person… THEMSELVES, it has to be torture, being alone with your own thoughts, and not liking the person would be bad, if not horrible. I guess they deserve what they get, and for sure making a person learn to like themselves or deal with being with the enemy, themselves is evil. Geez, turn down the music long enough with your headsets and your brain may resume functioning.
MTV Generation exported to Togo… Ok, I am cynical, but the best thing about Peace Corps is not helping a Village, I think that is only about 2 percent effective, the best is they go home and do know something about another country. Fetishes for example, and Voodoo, and how to win at a fantasy sport game by using Voodoo. Or to know that Yea, Freak, and Chillin are English words, specific, clear, good diction and explain how they think and feel. Up and away with awesome, another means very little adjective. More like a sideways grunt, my generation said cool, but I have stopped, and had withdrawal, when I decided to try to think.
Oops, he also said being in a boring city or extremely isolated was very stressful. And people pay to go on vacation to avoid stress, go figure…. The less they do the more the stress, I tell you it is living with the enemy, themselves that causes the stress.
I am glad I like me, someone has to.
Voodoo Stealing Testicles
Afternoon Togo Girl
I have a girl, she wants to visit me in the afternoons, I have no idea what her agenda is, she does not want to marry me, this is not normal for Africa, the proposal is normally in the first day, the girl proposes marriage and then wants a cell phone, probably the new Motorola Razor, at least the most expensive.
The girl is not a girlfriend, she is a girl that adopted me. I suppose winking at her was not fair, but she was looking hard. What am I to do, I just gave a wink and that win them all smile.
She says, can I visit, I am not sure, I want to say,
- Are you a prostitute? -
But that is pretty Gauche or Left, classless in English, but she could be, I hate this job of trying to figure out, are you a prostitute or not. IF you are one, please where a name tag, or a price tag. But you not prostitutes can also help out and ask to marry me, and make me meet your mother. A mother is a good clue.
Oh well, the girl Carol, I am still working on the name. It could be Karen, she cannot write it, she really speaks some Benin native language and French is a learned to use language.
She cannot write her name, looking up words in the dictionary with her, does no good. I am learning French in the most natural way, through a process of accidentally using a word, and seeing how it is a word, and how they used it.
But she is a cute teacher, I am sure the accent would make a French person die in their sleep. But who cares, there are too many French in France anyway. The have less than replacement birthrate, they are not even breeding enough to keep the same number, they are disappearing.
Carol went to lunch with me, I think she like it, I am not sure she ever seen ten dollars spent in one spot before. The Lebanese restaurant is expensive, it will be my last time today, the prices did not jive with the last time, so no more trips to this one. It is a great restaurant, I just did not do the negotiation need with the Arab Lebanese mind, I will not allow his clever mind to enjoy again. They love to be too clever.
All the major restaurants and hotels seem to be either Lebanese or French. Like they are always the management and the blacks are the workers, there does not seem to be a problem, I think it is a motivational problem if there is a problem.
Ran out of will to write on this, she is funny girls, comes over in the afternoon to chat for one hour and leaves. DueMay, or French for tomorrow, what she does at night is a mystery, I cannot speak French enough to inquire clearly.
Many photos of the story as it happened on the way to eat chicken, and she takes me to the market to try to buy things for her, which did not happen.
Note, she is 20 and no way to stop them here, I must learn French.... big problems.
Afternoon Togo Girl
Peace Corp Isolation
I walked in the internet café, finished up, said good bye in English to the Vitamin Deficit man, and turn around, some lady says,
- Where are you from. -
- The USA. -
- Yes, I know, but where.-
- Fort Wayne, Indiana, then north to a small village. -
Village is not used in the USA, I should have said Town, but I am not from the USA anymore, I am citizen of nowhere.
Ok, she is a mental health counselor, she said she works with Peace Corp or sometime does.
- Yep, some of them need help. -
I am making a joke, I think she is just talking,
- Yes, surprising the problems they have. -
- They did volunteer to sit in nowhere for a long time. -
I am thinking she is talking, however, she is serious, she is really giving counseling to the 2 year committed to living in a village Peace Corp Volunteers. I am think,
- Kick their A S S back home. -
Geez, I do hope the Peace Corp is not paying for counseling to Peace Corp Volunteers, but the lady seems to say they are…
Volunteer and cost the USA a lot of money.
Volunteers are sort of one step about a Choir Boy, they are not the super old, the super achievers. Although she says they are all type A personalities. I just saw about 25 more or less going to their villages.
I would think then I am Alpha Male, Type A, Red Meat Raw, cut a throat-per-day man. They are kids, not enough gumption to push, smart, educated, but not yet dry behind the ears. They are in my eyes, about 20 and less, maybe 25 and less in age, or younger. Never been away from home, yep, they probably need counseling.
These kids in the Peace Corp do a tough job, the learn the local languages, they become disillusioned, they learn they do very little, mostly they learn, and nothing happens. The biggest and best thing about Peace Corps in my brain, is that an American spends two years in one place, when they are not on vacation with their buddies at some backpacker hostel. They learn the one culture, they know more than most, they spent 2 years in one area of the world. The can now take that knowledge and help the CIA. That is a joke, but also true, they have a resume stamp that can get them a job overseas. I did, I did the two years. I did not quit.
I admire the Peace Corp Volunteers, if it is possible for me to admire a volunteer….
But counseling for isolation, deal with it, grow up, buck up, and get on with it.
Isolation is not a killer, it is boring, difficult, and you need to become your own best friend. Being most youth have no clue who they are, hard to even like the person they find… hehehe
Isolation, I could talk, let me think. I think I could write, three, 225 Trade Size Paperback books on how to deal with Isolation in travel or how to avoid, how to find intimacy in 5 minutes, and which cultures are stones. Africa is far from a STONE, it make China like Hell, and Asia like the sister of Hell. Africa is a very warm and friendly place, the Vitamins are missing for breakfast, slow on the draw, not a overly amount of active brain work here. But easy to find some friend that has a little interest in you besides money. And then, with a purchase or two you can purchase a conversation for less than 50 cents U.S.
The men have problems, I think they think they are macho, but only in groups, not a one on one thing.
Isolation, living in one place, hard to be isolated. Living every other week in another city, and it is easy. Amazing, I can start to work a city in the first day, know everyone in two, and have figured out how to do about anything in 7.
I would never feel isolated in one location, I have to move and leave all my new friends to find Isolation.
Normally the NGOs have a big boy friend within two days, but that is the real reason they came. NGO is different than Peace Corps, the Peace Corps actually lives sometimes in a village, unless transportation to the party is too easy.
The mind is an adaptive device, it learns how to cope. It can only learn by having a need. Pulling a person out of the field, so they can talk, deprives them of the acute need to adapt.
IF they are suicidal, then send them home, put them in solitary confinement.. Hehehe, same same but not a good as Peace Corps.
Counseling in my mind is some form of dysfunctional enabling process, paid for by the USA make work cure anything by advice, not by buck up, deal with it, grow up.
Peace Corp Isolation
Photos of Togo Ghana
I am trying to discover a quick way to put up many photos daily, I can take photos very fast, however, to write the captions just takes a long time. The depressing part is my need for instant completion high, I want to do a photo project, then publish the project, blog it, send it, and check it, I want to be completed from A to Z, and no missing alphabet soup.
Murphy’s Law, if anything can go wrong, it will go wrong is on hyper active alert status in West Africa when it comes to the Internet. I am presently having two absurd problems in the Vitamin Deficit managed internet café here in Lome, Togo. I have difficult getting Electricity, and second the man wants to cheat me daily. I have finally decide, either the Vitamin Deficit mind, really cannot do math, or he is a cheat. I think both at the same time actually. I have resorted to doing my normal strategy with cheat, I only have exact change. This makes finishing a project a lottery, do I have exact change for the amount of time it takes in the internet.
His bad breath also does not help, but more normal than you think. I am amazed at the workers in Internet Cafes in Africa, I personally could talk for day about Internet Cafes on the planet. Normally you have some quick math guys or girls in internet cafes. The ones in Africa are extreme slow speed, I am not sure if they can calculate in their heads. I usually am correct, they are wrong. Amazingly sad to see this actually, not a normal internet café staff person.
One of these days, I will come up with a new way to post photos faster, I am not sure how, I just know I can always improve. I keep hoping to send links, with one teaser photo in the blog, the send the readers to the link, this is a bigger money maker for me… hehehe
Any newsletter that forces you to leave the newsletter or blog is doing it to earn more money. I really do not want to stop putting photos in the blog, I want to give you the whole and complete group of photos that I took around the subjects.
I was explaining to Stellan the Swede how to make money with a blog, newsletter or writing on the internet. In the end, he wants to be famous, not to write, but that is a different curve ball.
But I was here, explaining, using a magazine or newspaper as an example. The take a photo, then write an article around the photo. Each article has one subject, a title, a brief synopsis to start, then they go into longer detail as they start, middle, and finish the story.
Blogger, wish to tell a long litany story, sometimes up to 10 pages of their monologue trip. Way more than average Joe blow can read in the three minute they can concentrate. They are gone, I was also trying to encourage him to write daily. He sends the post to his mom and she post anyway, so she does the heavy lifting.
Oh well, but while talking, I realized, I do not do what I say, I do limit to one subject, I do keep in the middle somewhere, maybe start and finish one subject. But I do not wrap photos in this way, I put many photos and captions below in groups of five, as if they are all related.
I am thinking one photo and a link to 10-30 I took in the one out walking around taking photos trip would be better wrapped and complete thought. Time is the enemy, but I end up putting the caption on as I go, or when I send the newsletter, either way, I am putting them caption on.
I can make a link with all the photos in less than 5 minutes, I can make the links for up to 100-200 photos in 10 minutes maximum now, it just is boring work to put captions on. I could send with no captions, but that is boring.
Maybe I can hire a little elf and put in my bag, to put captions on, maybe it can be a girl elf. I do not like putting captions on photos. The photo was finished when I took the photo, the thought was done for me, not for you, but for me, I was completed, I thought about it.
Photos of Togo Ghana
Travel Journal Enmeshment
Enmeshment is something connected:
ENMESH: catch in entanglement: to entangle somebody or something in something from which it is difficult to be extricated or separated.
I hate to read travel writers, I like to read or hear what a persons opinions, thoughts, feeling elicited, how they reacted to a novel experience.
However, if you wish to tell me somewhat should be Journalist rendition, (Journalist do not write like Journalist.) rendition of the NEWS of your travel, I am mildly interested. Extremely interested if I am looking for a hotel in the exact same city, but in the same price range.
A person blogging about travel has many stories.
Travel Sites or Destinations
If you look at the main page of HoboTraveler.com, you will see 150 categories. These are my top 150 subjects you or I can blog about, and off course, subcategories below.
I want to turn travel bloggers into I-pay-them-to-blog travel guide writers. Virtualtourist.com and TravelBlogs.com all convince nice unsuspecting travelers to blog away, pretend like they are providing a great service, then they make thousands of dollars off these blog posters. Content is king.
99 percent of the information is hogwash of little value, for me, takes 2 hours for what I can get in 2 minutes from the LP Lone Planet guidebook. However, these sites are not for travelers they are for person who are planning a trip, and for a person looking for ideas, or to be entertained very well.
For a guide, they suck, it is like the Lonely Planet Thorntree on the internet, it is impossible to use as an actually person in a very stupid, impossible to believe how stupid internet café here in West Africa.
I insert, much to my desire to avoid, I feel I need to, someone has to take responsibility, and the world needs to know information.
I know how to make a page that can be found by a rather simpleton google.com searcher, not good at it, does not understand, and gives up after two tries. Normal person, unless they want S E X or Music.
I have annoyed many with the prices of TroTro, Taxis or the ever present and resounding comments on the Visa Entente for Cote d’Ivoire, Burkina Faso, Togo, Benin and Niger, the one visa that can be used for 5 countries. This is a windfall and should or could expand the number of tourist into Africa by 10,000,000 percent. I do not know, cannot be bothered to calculate, but for ever 1 traveler here now, there could be 100 because of knowledge of this Visa. It makes West Africa possible and easy.
Enmeshment of these Guide thought is annoying for many readers, they do not care, they want to only see photos, think in myths, have the blogger reinforce a myth, all of Africa is primitive, dangerous and the girls are running around topless, I only wish.
Start telling the truth and destroy the fantasy and person stop reading. In a business, all things are valuable, 90 percent of the rabble needs to live in fantasy, so be it.
I think I know a way to seamlessly separate a blog into many categories without me having to be connected to the internet. YES, many blogs will create these categories. But THINK I am in Africa, I have a connection yesterday for one-hour until my battery died, the owner of the café is brain dead, needs some vitamins, cannot see… I need electricity; he does no service, just wants money. In the end, sitting around categorizing thought is time consuming, confusing, and boring. I may do as I make, but I did not even know the categories when I started. I have no desire to be famous, make money yes, but to sit around putting my best foot forward, creating an illusion that I am always organized is fantasy, get a life.
I may have a solution, I know a way, and we have developed some technology that can be used for this. The problem is this. I can post to blogger.com by email, but it only works 70 percent of the time, if it breaks and does not post, it goes into the vacuum of the internet. It has to be received and posted 100 percent of the time. It cannot bounce.
Travel Journal Enmeshment
Direct and Indirect Talking
The many lives of Andy the HoboTraveler.com.
I am in a quagmire of confusion, I have many lives, I have many paths I can take, I wish to always to continue to travel, to explore, to be endlessly curious.
I believe, as is the popular word presently in,
- Transparency -
There is the new buzzword or way to explain an honest person, company or government. Strange we come up with a word after a couple million years, and it becomes popular.
The USA culture make other cultures extremely angry, I can make a German person so angry, they will explode, just by saying the truth.
I can say the truth to a Latino, Mexico, Central and South America and they will ignore 100 percent.
I can say the truth to an Asian and they will fall down on the ground. Heheheh. I was in Pai or Northern Thailand, I told the man he was a liar and he fell down on the ground. They do not have people talk direct with them.
India… hehehe, they will twist what you say and make you feel guilty, a very clever culture.
Africa will say yes to a comment, but not understand.
Most cultures will say no, and continue to say no, until they understand and then they will nod their heads.
Clever, most cultures want to believe they are clever.
Listen to Kofi Annan the head of the United Nations, then listen to President Bush from the USA. Kofi says nothing, but the comments that will make the majority of S H I T countries happy. He plays to the audience to be popular.
President Bush makes the whole world angry, because he does not play game, he is direct.
IF anything is wrong in the USA policy, it is the failure to know that direct comments infuriate the world. In the USA we consider and honest and direct comment admirable, however dangerous maybe, the USA is a piddle small part of the planet. 1999 we passed the SIX billion people on the planet mark, and the USA on a good day has 300 Million.
USA - THE RULING CLASS
6 Billion people on the planet 6,000,000,000
USA has 3 Million 300,000,000
300,000,000 / 6,000,000,000 = 5 percent
5 percent of the people rule 95 percent of the
planet, add in Europe and 10 percent rules
the 90 percent.
Anyone who has children knows, a child will twist and manipulate a conversation to get their child ways. They will spend their time trying to say it clever, to try to convince the parent they are correct. The parent listens, then rather politely, diplomatically, and hopefully corrects the child. In the 90 percent of the planet maybe 80 percent of the planet, they are just beaten down mentally, listen, however never listen, there is very little clear functional conversations.
I am in a quagmire, my Mother, Father, Nephews, Nieces and good friends that write me weekly are in the 90 percent of the planet, maybe a sub-group within the USA.
I need to make a decision, I think; I do not have to make a decision, but maybe a good idea to make a decision. The percentage of time I spend just lying around thinking about my present location has changed. In the past, I thought about 90 percent of the time about where I was at, and what I was doing daily.
I could just blog away, and my Mother would be happy, 10 percent of the time, she was not. Now, she is sending me emails, your blog is not interesting, I am lost, I am writing in my diary for myself, not for you Mom. Yes, it is a business of sorts, but still, I do not type here to entertain you, if I did that, I would have to think more on how to manipulate the audience to make them happy.
As we speak, I know the HoboTraveler.com is taking applications for workers, we are in the process of hiring many 300 dollars per month employees from places like India, Bulgaria, Ukraine, Pakistan and hopefully Ghana, the Philippines is hurting, hard to force them to grow up and perform, not a serious bunch.
Nonetheless, HoboTraveler.com is using up my brainwave, when my computer is not working, many people below are affected, not only reader, blogging or not blogging is only an enjoyment ratio. I am talking money; persons could be out of work, because I cannot assign jobs. One lady has children in school, she is trying to buy books, she is India where an employer will make here work and never even pay, she wants to work, she is not a complainer, I am complaining.
So in many ways, Chris, Craig, Mom, Dad, Gary, Ashley and many others that never write or post are also on my mind. Am I boring you to death, should I separate my life into two compartments?
Africa Travel Journal and What I do to make money.
I had a friend that went to palm readers, and fortune tellers, for many years he would tell me what the person said, how he or she predicted, many times the friend would even ask the person questions about my friendship with this person. The friend would talk for hours about what the future would bring or not bring according to the fortuneteller.
I listened to this for many hours, or hundreds of hours.
One day, and over the course of a month, my friend decided I should also go to a fortuneteller. He then proceeded to tell me he would pay, I did my best to bow out, but he was insistent. My friend was to say the least, extremely eccentric, I like him because you could never predict the conversations, he would dwell on subject many would consider crazy or off the wall, he was not crazy, eccentric and had too much time to think and wonder. A great benefit in life.
He was insistent, I must go to the fortuneteller, he finally gasped in desperation, and said,
- Why won’t you go? -
- I not believe in fortunetellers. -
It was listening to the stories of watching my unders.
I listened with an open mind to a girl studying to be a Doctor in Ghana tells me this long and convoluted story about watching my unders, to take care, to be cautious.
She never asked,
- What do you think? -
She assumed I agreed, I thought she was superstitious and prone to putting responsibility for her life into the hands of others. In my mind a form of dysfunctional behavior and not something, I can change. I must accept, I can change my pants, my clothes, I cannot change other people.
My fortune telling insistent friend pushed and I said,
- I do not believe in fortune tellers.-
- Why do you listen? -
- You believe. -
He says, not happy,
- But you do not.-
- Why do you listen to something you do not believe.-?
- I am your friend, I listen to my friends, and I do not have to agree or even want to listen to feel I should listen. A friend listens. -
- Why did you not tell me? -
- Why, to try to squash a belief you have, I do not know, it is possible you are correct and I am wrong. -
In the end, I felt, 99.0 percent he was dreaming; I would not participate or enable the dream to become some reality in my world. That to me is dysfunctional or a temptation to become dysfunctional.
Watch my Unders
I had a couple of readers write and say, I needed to be more open minded. I am amazed, I was extremely open minded, I listed, did not squash this person belief, I only believe it is possible maybe one-tenth of one percent and that is stretching it in my mind. I fell 99.9 percent sure I control my stars; I am in absolute control of my destiny, or better to say, I am 100 percent responsible for my destiny.
Right or wrong, controlled by me, or not controlled by me, I am responsible.
This girl is a free agent, capable of introspection being, she has volition and all the other psychobabble crap. She is free to do as she wishes, and I have ZERO right to stop her, and as her friend respect here 100 percent to think as she wishes. I have no desire to change her.
Now, I am writing in my diary, nobody needs to read this, so what I say is a free choice on the side of the readers. I am obligated to myself 100 percent to say or think what I am thinking, unedited.
I suppose the readers believe I should listen, I do listen, but I do not obey, and eventually readers become obstinate,
- Listen to me. -
- Obey -
They need control over something that is not controllable. (Me) Moreover, will become furious sometimes, attack, you must change, hate mail and all sort of other funny things, yet annoying.
Blah Blah Blah, I am trying to decide, should I separate the business type boring for my Mother Blog postings from the more Photo Story, fun to read, sit on a medical office table magazine type of writing?
Writing is cathartic for me, it is the way I can make decisions, I have nobody to talk these things over with, except myself.
- purifying: producing a feeling of being purified emotionally, spiritually, or psychologically as a result of an intense emotional experience or therapeutic technique a film that had a truly cathartic effect on me (2)
Writing helps me sort out my feelings and decide where to go, what to do, and why, all the interrogatives.
Clean House, I get to clean house and put all my thought away in their proper places. Travel is for most an excuse to never put away all the thoughts, as we can say; I have too many new things to explore. Hard to make a person be responsible for how they act, behave, or think when they are on a vacation from thinking.
The normal way travelers deal with travel is to drink to oblivion and put all possible resolution of thoughts on hold, at least for sure until they go home. IF the never go home, then they go crazy.
Resolution of thoughts, I will work, I went to the toilet, and had a great solution pop in my brain on how to solve this enmeshment of thought and make my mother happier.
Direct and Indirect Talking
Lebanon Humiliated by Israel
I was watching this Donor conference on CNN today, he says in his own word this Sigiori guy or something like that said they was
- Humiliated -
I would think he would be afraid to talk; it appears that his Mullah or Hezoballah guy is running the country and not him. He for sure is humiliated as a puppet leader. On the other hand, I am not sure, does Syria or Iran run Lebanon, the leader for sure does not, and then he goes begging for money, what a wimp.
Israel about 8-9 million people surrounded by about 150-200 million and more people with only one goal. The genocide of Israel, then you get this conference in Sweden another country that supports the genocide of Israel.
This is not just a bunch of sweat children; this is a systematic attempt by people in Europe and all of the Middle East to kill all the Israel people.
The bottom line is this, Israel people are extremely smart, nobody wants a bunch of persons around that just by intellect will be their boss. In a fair world, they lose, the brains win. Therefore, the whole Middle East, maybe over 200 million people are afraid of 7 million, they know they cannot compete, so they want genocide of them.
They are not going to like it when Sweden decides to kick the 1,000,000 Islamic out of their country when they finally realize, they are being invaded by a culture that does not take integrate and live in peace. Nothing peaceful about this culture.
Everyone keeps agreeing to crap, Israel, a pipsqueak country, of 7 millions dominates. Yes, USA gives them money, but they have the brains to use it.
The Middle East is pumping black gold out of the ground; they still need something to use it with. Of course, as long at the leaders have a common enemy of Israel, just like Hitler, the people will never stop and think, hmmm, are my leaders keeping me stupid.
Sweden, I want to dream of Viking or fighters, not a bunch of pacifist with one of the worse suicide rates on the planet. They do not kill anyone, they are too busy killing themselves, and without that by drugs… hehehe
Lebanon Humiliated by Israel