About Andy Graham of Hobotraveler.com
My 5 Lucky List of Life Experiences Andy Graham
I am Andy Lee Graham from Orland, Indiana; I am presently in Cape Coast, Ghana as a world traveler who has been to 90 countries. I have live 15 years on the road, life is simple, easy, and fun today.
But, Anglophone Ghana is full of a populace that endlessly try to shame me into giving them money for nothing, it the good and bad revealed by confusion.
All the good Gods allowed mortal man to torture me, offering me the choice of two roads in life. After this list of 5 lucky experiences, I had a choice, I could become bitter, mean, ornery arrogant SOB doomed to repeat the problems endlessly, or I could say to myself,
My 5 Ways of Experience Total Humiliation and Guilt.
Pubic shame, shunning is the grace of the good Gods in action.
1. Prayer before Dinner: I was a lucky man; I was raised in a Christian family. When I sit down at dinner with a family, my first thought is;
“We need to say prayer before we eat.”
I was fortunate enough to attend protestant Christian Churches, whereby the ministers would scream hell fire until they turned red, it was a wondrous feeling of love and guilty, shame entwined with lets just go live our life in farm town peace. Religion is an absolutely confusing thing, if you never question it, it is probably paradise, a great place for liars, who will pretentiously spout off things they believe, in an endless tirade of do this, and do that, but really atheist in action and practice. Once the hypocrites pass the doorway, once a person get on past all the crap humans blocking the path, there is some real high moral values in a few people. In a way, it is possible to wade out of a religion towards saintly, and magnanimous works. My parents are not Saints by a long shot, but they are imbued with some true guilt, and shame, and try their best to do the right thing, this prayer before dinner was always a reminder of what a mass of jerk humans can be, and people making me feel guilty, is not going to allow me to enjoy dinner. There is a serenity and clarity once you ignore the human interpretations of the bible, and study the good Gods. Truly I do not care about Christians, Buddhist, Hindus or any religions, half a dozen one, six the other, they are all sort of pointed towards making me feel guilty, and eventually I gave up, and behaved at all cost, saying never again. I can feel gulty, I refuse to be a jerk and do things that make me feel guilty.
2. My Four Driving While Intoxicated Convictions.
I am also lucky enough, and fortunate enough, and forever I will be grateful for becoming an alcoholic, with four DWI’s. (Driving While Intoxicated.).
I ended up being losing my driver’s license for 10 year, and being on house arrest for a year. Nothing more humiliating than driving around on moped in snow storms in Indiana, and having people honk at you. After going to all the self-help sessions of an alcoholic, and now having been sober for 25 years. It is humilty to know, you are but a jerk in remission, and that all people are delusionally under the belief they too are not a jerk, at least I am in remission, there is the mass of the world who still suffers for what they do, always wrapped up in nice wrapping, but underneath beating their fellow man down.
Public shame is a wondrous experience, I think everyone should be put n the public square, and have bullies walk by and throw tomatoes and rotten eggs at you. It creates character, and insight into the vile nature behind people in power, nothing intoxicates a person more than given the ability to throw tomatoes at the defenseless.
3. I Broke My Femur in Motorcycle Accident.
I was 23 years old at the time, in perfect physical condition from working on Indiana farms, bailing hay, and doing farm chores, working 70 hour work weeks during summer vacations from Indiana University. In the course of one week, after a motorcycle accident, I went from a blond, haired, blued eyed candy for girls, to a disabled invalent.
People love to look down on people, it is kick to know, they love to kick me, they love to say, it happened to you, and you deserved it. All amazing the ability of Motorcycle riders to say,
“I am too smart to be in motorcycle accident.”
By the way, a drunk driver turned left right into me, no way to dodge that bullet, the car broke a 23 year old man in half.
4. I Filed Bankruptcy 20 some years ago. I tried the BS idea of paying a little to all my creditors, but they all wanted it all, few people are reasonalbe, only when forced. One would sue, then another. I was just a cog in the wheels of the collection agencies. They would call, lay guilt, law suits, and harass me at all hours of the day or night. Every human believes they are on the high moral ground when someone owes them money. It is good fun now to listen to people say I owe them money.
I truly enjoy Apple Computers, and the user of Apple, there is this moral thing, if you are smart, then you would PAY 2-3 times more to have our computer, it will make you a morally good and better person than your fellow man, you will be above the rest.
This is always fun, as if money makes me a better person, it just means I spent the money, nothing to do with being a better person.
5. Publicly Humiliation
The overwhelming amounts of condemnation, humiliation, shunning given to me by family, friends, the general public, and legal system. I want to lave this as a general topic, my over developed sense of guilty and shame, my mother always says,
“Andy, you are lucky you did not kill someone drinking, you would never have able to live with that.”
You surely will believe this is a list of horrible things, and somehow I am a jerk, but more accurately, I am a jerk in remission.
I have been a jerk in remission for 25 years, I have now been a good guy more years than I was a jerk, and the good has won the battle.
The power of these 5 lucky situations for me was this, I can expose to you, or any person on the planet my worst, allow you, or any person to think, and even give you the opportunity to try to make me look bad, to do your best to humiliate me.
You see this on CNN, or reporters, they take words, turn them, twist them and try to make a good person stumble. They do not care whether a person is good or bad, they try to destroy for the sake of a story, the “Michael Moore” way of making a documentary, he try to destroy, to make him appear to not be the fat SOB loser he really is, then cloud the thing with the words documentary.
The 5 experiences took me into a dark, cloudy day, a life that pure misery, but allow me to adjust, to learn coping skills, to learn how to handle any thing the world give me.
Public shame is a wonderful thing, and even a bully can help a wise person to find the road to salvation, the bullies are the pin ball bumpers of life.
I am in Ghana, West Africa, and each day, some over-zealous Christian girl asks me shamelessly for a gift. It is amazing how many say,
“Where is my Christmas gift?”
There is almost zero shame; they truly believe I should give them something for nothing.
The world if full of God’s children, and I tell myself daily, it is not my right to spank them, this is the job for the bullies, and there will never be a shortage of people claiming to be good, when truly bad. I often think of ministers, clerics, mullahs, monks, it is hard to not think of them as bullies, I know not all of them are, but I still walk on the other side of the street, but I have been down, and know they can kick, they are not safe.
Find a few happy and save people this year, and stay away from the emotional vampires, who make you feel weak.
Andy Graham Cape Coast, Ghana 2013, the land of Children, both heaven and hell, wrapped up in red dust, hyperbole, and words like I suffer as they talk on their cell phones. West Africans are not poor, this is some make you feel guily until you give me money ploy.
Use by employees, poor people and Christian ministers, now, it is not right or wrong, that is their game. The game I choose to play is to do the right thing, be a good boy today. There is away way to walk away from crowd, and find a safe place free of people with their should, coulds, and woulds in life, that never ending merry go round of shame and guilt.
Sin less today, so you can spend less time praying, it just is the right thing to do whether there is a God or not is irrelevant.
Fun stuff, life is good.