I Envy My Readers, I Want a Life Like Theirs

This is Andy Lee Graham, and I envy my readers. I want to have a wife, children and a big house in the suburbs.

I want my wife to nag me to put on clean clothing. Then I would go load up the car with a bunch of rugrats and go to church on Sunday. I want to fall asleep while listening to the preacher, who is trying to make us feel guilty. When he has an alter call and everyone starts crying, I will go the toilet.

I want to be just like my father.

Orland Indiana

When talking about my world travels, I meet three types of people: the jealous, the envious and the arrogant.

I was talking with my friend, Stephen; he has lived in Thailand, Switzerland, Singapore and China. Then after living abroad for a few years, he went to Boston and worked for a couple of years.

He said to me on our Skype connection, "When you tell them about your travels, people will be jealous, envious or arrogant."

Jealous: Why you and not me?

Envious: They want to join.

Arrogant: They are closed minded, stubborn and offensively tell you why you live a bad life.

But who is Andy Lee Graham? I, too, am jealous, envious and arrogant.

I am jealous of National Geographic writers who get interviewed on CNN or make documentaries. I want them to shut up and ask me to talk instead. (It annoys me to no end that they think they know something, without having their feet on the ground.)

I am envious of people who are married with children. I want to join them, live the same life and talk about children at parties.

I am arrogant when a person treats me with contempt, and I reciprocate. When treats me arrogantly, I erase them from my life.

When I talk with friends, I want to hear about their families and what they do for fun with the children. Yet they always drone away about working too hard, making money, and how they need to get off the phone. Or they complain about the children or wife.

Yet I know they love them, or they would be with me, playing and running around the planet.

We — The Good People Problem

I want expert members of the Hobo Travel Community to share their expertise in a safe harbor, with safe passage. My dream is to allow the good people a voice, to ask questions in an area of safety, to call me (with respect) and have me help them. And when they want too much, they pay; I am a big boy.

A person wrote me: “Do I need to pay you $50 to call you?”

I started to laugh to myself; this is the “good people problem.” He did not want to annoy me and did not want to accidentally feel like he owed me money. He was a good person.

I wrote back, “I try to get the people that think that I owe them travel advice or an email to stop. I do not make money writing emails, and they write in pure selfishness.”

I try to get people to call, so I can avoid typing. Yet, I answer a lot of emails. And if a person poses a great question, then I cannot refuse myself: I must answer for my own pleasure, to become clear in my head. And I am more than willing to call up experts, take up their time, and try my darndest to buy their products.

I am envious of my mother and father’s life, 62 years of marriage. I speak with them in awe. I am the lucky son of two great humans, thank the good gods, whether real or unreal, with all the faith my future wife can force on me.

I am here, and you are there, and we will one day meet.

Andy Lee Graham in Sosua, Dominican Republic, envious of people in the USA but refusing to give up the life of leisure. I want to be a mobile household, the best of all worlds.

Please, I hope you take all that above with a grain of salt. I will never return to the USA to live. I have the dream life. I want to call you and learn from you, and you can call me.

I hate to type. I do that all day. I want to talk. … hehehe …

Andy Lee Graham

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