Hi, Andy. I am fascimated by you observation about African parents portraying litlle if any love for their children. Have you been able to define when (age wise) when this happens. I.e. Child is able to get ARound and sort of fend for it self? Do the mothers show any personal attention when their kids are infant to toddler age? Does their seem to be any relationship to the number of children per parent? Or, do the parents just get lazy and send the kids off to do the begging/ jobs? Interesting that you haven't noticed AIDS in this area. Was that true of the others in western Africa? One last ?...What seemed to change in the NGO's attitude after he stayed on longer than the usual 9 months. God bless you recovery, your humanity, and your explorations.
I try to convince my friend Gary, my Mom and others to learn to post good comments or questions on the Blog, and allow the world to enter into the fray… Please, writing me does allow good ideas to be passed around.
West African Women love children, not men, the women probably Love their children the same as 90 percent of the planet. I think if you want to learn about caring, study the men, a better observation of care and couple it with their religion.
Love for children is about the same in about 80 percent of the planet, and I think Africa is exceptionally good care for Orphans. They do not separate their infant or child from the child of others, more or less there is this I care for all children mentality, your child is my child, and when a girl becomes a prostitute and goes to the big city, the mother just takes the extra babies and continues on, I have not seen an AIDS orphans.
I am in favor of most child labor, I see nothing wrong with children working in the fields or helping their family to carry water, sell food or mining as I saw in Bolivia all normal. The problem again is men sitting around, drinking beer and having wives and children as slaves. Then the religions of the world support this behavior, making it close to impossible to say anything. Religion is the pivotal problem, as most religions give special advantages to Men.
A big problem is girls must have sex with teacher to have the money to pay for school. Of the girls go out to prostitute themselves for school fees.
Men on the planet use their dominant size to control women and children, and the religions than support the abuses.
However, children are possession of Mothers and Fathers to make them happy, a selfish desire to make a child into their likeness when good parents and to make them work when not good.
I suppose there is always the little abuse child in everyone, not me, because I am 100 percent sure, I was not abused. I probably abused my parents and this is become a bigger problem in the USA as parents get a 24/7 you are not doing enough for children lecture as the pendulum swings.
Love is learned behavior, love of children is learned, this is why I said, one jar of love to go. A person needs to buy it, they need to buy the time, and give it to people, the world comes and makes the un-needed orphanages, and they need them in India 10 times more than Africa. The volunteers do not come to love Africa, they come to fix Africa, and they do not want to get involved if anyone gets angry.
I think love for children need to be intrusive into another person’s life; a person does have the right to tell his or her neighbor to stop abusing their children. I sometime go over to stand next to women or children where the drunken father is being too much. Africa does not have many drunks, but places like Mexico has many. Drinking is a very small problem in West Africa, which is normally the number one problem in the world, too much alcohol, and the Volunteer come and are teaching them how to drink better and they are learning.
For the beggars, a religion here was sending out groups of boys to beg, and then wanting them to bring back 200 CFA, again part of the abuse by Religions and dangerous to talk about. All religions are abusive at base level, and do very little to help the people. Anytime a Monk, Priest, Mullah, Sadhu thinks they have the rights above their people this leads to abuse, same as when the leader walk around like they are special, special is a merit thing, not an appointment or choice, good work does deserve respect, not a label or title.
Men are abnormally lazy in West Africa, they do about 10 percent of the work, while in Asia about 25 and in Central and South America about 40-50 the Indians doing more than the Mestizos. Religions are abusive and out of control, all of them, the Buddhist build temple by daily taking of money and making sure the people know who did not give, other religions make not giving hearsay or punishable by death.
To teach care, is more about defending about abuse, to stop the abuser, more or less to say no, when everyone disagrees. This is why good modern time’s leaders are hated, they stop abusers. The rabble, the normal person is just an innocent goes with the crowd bystander, sort of groups hysteria with a twist.
The United Nations is correct to focus on women rights, but the more pivotal problem is abuse by Religions and leaders of nations.
I get in trouble here when I treat the women with equal respect as the men, but the men deserve so little respect here, even hard to give them the time of day, half-way respect, they take lazy to new levels.
Women though take good care of children, and breastfeed, I think care could maybe be correlated to breastfeed and carrying of children. At what age does the mother refuse to pick up the child, doe the mother consider breastfeeding needed, or do they put a bottle in their mouth and say be happy.
Love of children is making a many-layered cake, everyone country does it different and children do not need money, they need time.
Time… how long does it take to shake the hands of 10 small black children in West Africa? Than how do I get them to stop following me? A high five takes longer, and a child that is too timid takes longer. If the father starts to intimidate the mother or child, will you step up and intimidate the father. Will you allow a religious person to intimidate you? Can you hold your own?
Mothers on the planet are 90 percent selfish; they will usually take care of themselves before their children. In the end, the mother needs the money and the free time, love requires though first time, then money. Nevertheless, love is learned, and a one person at a time job, the TV is what is teaching the children now how to live, or ignore, or be ignored, when someone tells me they are too busy, I know how much they love me.
NGO change because they realize they are not doing anything to solve the problems, they are just here. The are romantics, full of idealistic who have trouble tying their shoes, they think if they go fix or help others they can save themselves. In the end, they do save neither and realize they are tourist, on mission. I am not sure, I tell people in West Africa, I did not come to save you, you do not need it, you are looking great, stop being bullies and life would be good, and if the men started to work just 10 percent, more they would be rich. This place has more natural land resources sitting doing nothing, I truly believe the Resource Curse is a reality.
NGO send children to do adult jobs, what do you expect, a 22 year old is going to save the planet? I think an NGO or Volunteer need to have had a job for 5-10 years and be over 30 to have a clue, more or less the NGO are full of people who want to be someone, not who are someone, get a vocation, before you come to teach, or accept you are just on Vacation getting stamp on your CV or Resume.
Africa will progressively behave, the camera is on them, the most effective weapon is a camera, nobody wants to the seven o clock news as they abuse their baby or take a bribe, I like to take pictures of dirty laundry, a good way to clean the planet.