I want to melt them
I like to turn on the charm, give a person a great big down home, Indiana shake your hand hello. I like to melt them; it makes me feel good to be personable and friendly.
I just woke up out of deep sleep, as normal, I felt as if I was on the top bunk, in some strange land, I was about to fall out of bed. It was too dark in my room to know any difference; there are no sounds outside my room. I laid here in my bed, looking at dark, trying to clear my head. I feel weak, however I also feel stronger.
The Hawks won yesterday I am told.
I feel that maybe this travel thing is hurting me more than it is helping me, I am worried. I am not the same love everyone person I was when I left Indiana, not that Indiana person are all love you, kiss you, hold you people. However, I know in Indiana I could melt the coldest of hearts, and eventually break them down, make a friend. I believe you can do that to anyone; however, I know that I am starting to not want to. It becomes more difficult each day to fight the good fight, to put my best foot forward.
I like Culture, I like to learn how a person says hello to each other in other cultures, whether is a - Que mas - in Colombia or a - Todo Bin - in Brazil, or - Sawasdee Kalp - in Thailand, there is normally a way.
I think they say - All right - here in the Caribbean many times, sometime - Hey - , I am not always sure, as the English is difficult to understand.
Maybe this is the problem, when I say Hello here, melting a person that cannot understand me, has no idea why I am saying hello, does not trust me, does not know me, however in the end has maybe never had many white people say hello is difficult.
Anguilla is easy, the people here are easier to melt, and I can get a smile on their face faster than the countries and cultures south of here. I do think in Barbados it was or could be a start of the change from the South of the Caribbean to the North of the Caribbean and how this bleeds into the Bahamas who knows. There are cultural lines, boundaries, where one culture tries to start and another tries to stop. Normally there are some natural boundaries like a river or a mountain range.
This is the physical features map from my Encyclopedia Encarta (2). You can see the Allegheny Mountains, Ohio River, Delaware.
I can hear John Denver singing that popular song, I think name - Country Roads-
- Almost Heaven, West Virginia, Blue Ridge Mountains, Shenandoah River, life is older, older than the hills, younger than the mountains, country roads, take me home, to a place I belong. -
There are rivers, roads, mountains, and some separation of culture, maybe the language will change, maybe this section was old German Farmers, maybe the French wanted to go south and create come - Villes, or who can figure out all of this clearly. The evolution of culture is not clean; it is a hodgepodge of mixes.
The north against the south, the - Gone with the Winds - This is about cultures, fighting, sometime forcing themselves to mix. To me as I understand, the book - Gone with the Wind - was about a culture, which was Gone with the wind. It ended, suddenly, like the stopping of the wind.
How wonderfully distinct the cultures can or could be considered in the Caribbean, as we have African, Spanish, Portuguese, French, British, Dutch all snapping at their heels trying to carve out a piece of the rock. Just like the USA it is a melting pot, you can see it simmering and stirring around, language changes, good and false claims. One country saying it is this, one island saying it is that.
I have been muddling around in my Encyclopedia trying to understand these countries. It is interesting as I talk with tourist in the Caribbean. The guidebook put or overlays a heavy religious culture or conservative nature of the Caribbean. The people read this and then they repeat this.
READ AND REPEAT
Then it become true, this is an annoying thing to me about reading and learning, it like anything in writing is the truth, while not anything I am seeing is the truth. It is the same with the CNN or BBC effect, as if anything the reporters say is true while the reality and be very different.
The Caribbean is very religious, I see and feel the religious nature in signs, posters, and many churches everywhere. I would not say it is conservative, as the guidebook would lead you to believe. Cultures can and do change very rapidly, and now with the television, the culture of music videos, in the last 10 years or 20, I am not sure when.
MTV Music TeleVision - network was founded in 1981- (2)
Ok for about 25 years the dominant cultural influence, world changing cultural movement is the Music Video.
I guess this is somewhere over the rainbow, I am trying to figure out how to melt the cultures I meet, how to become part of the area, how to melt myself into their cultures. I like to live with the cultures, not be the visitor. I can adjust and come in close with the Christian Cultures very fast, the Islamic ones are very friendly however I am not Islamic therefore not part of whatever.
Anguilla was like a breath of Fresh Air yesterday after many of the other countries I have visited. I am in Crocus Bay area of Anguilla, I am not able yet to find the rich areas of Anguilla, this is ok, I am not that excited to re-enter the tourist bubble. I am happy to be out of the tourist bubble.
Caribbean is about 90 percent African
It appears to me that inside the tourist bubble areas Bob Marley and MTV is the religion and in the area I am located presently it is about 90 percent for normal religion culture and 10 percent for the Bob Marley - MTV culture.
What this means is the balance is better, I know or feel that MTV is not a good influence on the children of the planet. It is meant to be fun, entertaining and everyone can say what he or she will, believing music is harmless.
Words can hurt, I know the words I put in my brain, the words I allow to enter my brain is the person I become. I can feel the changes happening to me slowly as I become a man of the world and not a man from Indiana. It is not what I want; I want to be a man from Indiana, a place where everyone knows you name. However, I will become the person you expect me to be, I will become the people around me, I will become slowly the local culture. I have no choice, I am what is I am around.
I have a person that wants me to talk more about my alcoholism, not the best subject to talk about, for many reasons. However, the way a person stops drinking is by changing their playmates and playpens. Not by just making a choice. It is a decision to change people around you, not a decision to stop. It is to change completely what a person allows in their life. I do not allow many of the words I hear or many of the lyrics I hear on MTV to enter my world. I will not pretend, try to be macho, try to say, it does not mean anything, all words you say to me, mean something.
Hard hearts are difficult to melt, tourist can be very hard, travelers sometimes can be harder.
Primitive cultures are softer than the modern cultures; I like the more primitive cultures because they have nicer hearts. Many people will make fun of President Bush for talking about Religion, or God, or saying things about God. This is difficult, I can see their point, however would you rather have a person up there professing to say or believe that I am the King of Atheist, I do not believe in GOOD, or GOD.
Not that simple, however there is a light and a dark path.
I am trying to learn about the Caribbean, I have many people read or may not read, I really could care less. However when I type in my blog, and any person that would type a blog when they are traveling, I would speculate or hope they write into three areas of time they travel.
What they expect or think the will or could see.
This is the confusion stage, where you do not understand
The impressions after you see a culture.
There is an impression, ideas, decisions you make much later, maybe a year later, maybe a month later, however one my brain has tossed around what I have seen, put the experiences through the wash machine a few time, they will come out dried and ready to hang up, this is my thoughts on the country.
I am sad.
I see people writing what they believe they should write for other persons; this to me destroys the value of a journal or diary. It to me is a great place to work through my thoughts and views, a sounding board of taking my abstract feeling and evolving them into words.
I read Blogs where the person is so positive what they seen, I read the guidebook, and it is as if they are making an opinion into a fact.
The Hawks won yesterday in Anguilla, maybe.