I think the answer is... I do not know. I suppose as I get closer to actually entering the country. I will decide if I am afraid. I do not feel afraid now. I have been to a lot of places in the world. Most places are really safe and people think they are dangerous. The world press makes a fantasy of the world. Real life is much more mundane. Even danger.
We each have views of ourselves, and opinions of who we are.
Sometime these are just delusions. I am hoping that I have no delusions about myself, and my abilities.
But that is the nasty thing about delusional behaviour. A person is in denial of the delusion.