Chaos is my Paradise

I want you to watch this video, it explains how normal people are often asleep, and do not want to be disturbed. Explanations of my chaotic life wakes up people, this is not always a good thing, but it may be the best thing.

Chaos: Lacking Predictability

Not Predictable
Why is this important to me, I have this quirky way of writing, that somehow engages the minds of readers, it can make some long deep seated feelings come bursting to the surface, the reader than proceeds to try to provoke, mock, and destroy my sense of happiness with torrents of comments. They do not destroy my calm, it cannot work, writing is like a sport to me, the goal is to make readers feel. When I want, I can easily avoid playing, while they are obsessed with what they see an insult, they continue to return to this well, and try to attack again and again, they cannot leave, I awoke them, the reader felt something. I see my life as a chaotic paradise, which is confusing to people Happiness is not being in a Five Star resort surrounded by bikinis, happiness is when we are in chaos, we are happy, and we know it is paradise.

Thank you David for sending the link to this video, I enjoy insightful explanations.

Sosua, Dominican Republic --- Saturday, February 13, 2010
By Andy Graham of
Travel Gear |  | Top Travel Site

If you do not see a video here it is because you are reading by email, click here: Travel Videos

I change my home daily, or weekly, I never have the same bed, the same closet, and the same showers. The rules of my existence change daily, I cannot anticipate that tomorrow will be the same as yesterday.

I enjoy being awake, if I fall asleep, I will travel to a more chaotic situation, a place where my mind is challenged, where I am alive. Readers come and go, some wake up, and maybe stay awake, others just go back to sleep. It is not comfortable to be awake, it means we have to care, feel, and accept that life is good, or bad, and it is our responsibility.

Haiti was paradise, this beach Resort called Sosua is just me stopping to clean up my internet house, the calm before the storm.

All this mans videos are maybe here: Anthony de Mello

Chaos is my Paradise


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In recent years our budget backpacker guests have changed acting like NEEDY tourist who NEED to be PAID ATTENTION to, expect budget accommodations to have the same customer service standards as the hotels they are familiar with in other countries. I've always LOVED meeting and sharing travel adventures with world travelers who were seeking alternative lifestyles outside their own country of origin. But I have to admit, I "HATE" Tourists or anybody with low thresh holds for discomfort also and REFUSE to cater to their "champagne tastes on beer budgets" like "spoiled brats". CHAOS as you have pointed out makes life a more interesting adventure for me, I've always maintained an almost spiritual FAITH in myself, the future and life in general never choosing a safe, secure path in life. For example, I haven't had health insurance since I was 18 and left my parents house and policy and raised our daughter withOUT a family doctor nor insurance policy instead we kept cash for emergencies ( or good investments ). Though we also don't agree on many issues and hold opposite opinions on a few issues more or less we're in the head space. So keep on doing your thing where ever it takes you.

Yes you do have a great style of writing that mostly annoys me. But I enjoy it and come back for more. Currently I have the luxury of wireless internet for a couple days. Therefore I think I must go annoy Andy and have fun. But I learn a lot in the process.

You provoke me with your style of writing, so maybe I feel like I have to retaliate. But I do realize your are a human on the other side of the wire and truly don't want to hurt you.

So you say we can not destroy your calm. So that makes me feel good and I realize that it is a stimulating game called writing.


I have been reading comments for years, some are vicious sociopaths, others are confused, others are enlightened, others take my ideas, and add more.

I try to weigh the intentions. I know many writers want to steal the topic, make the theme their, diminish my intention. I allow this, knowing that many will go down the wrong path.

I write for the one, not for the many, there is always one who stays the course and finds the best path. To follow the group is comfortable, but to live outside the group is in my opinion to be alive.

Scott, I weigh you by your intentions, but the person who really should be evaluating your intentions is you. Are you trying to suggest solutions, or are you just being Michael Moore, denigrating me or an idea for your own personal magnification of personality.

My intention was true in my discussion with my friend about why I thought you disliked tourist. I found it amusing and my friend and I discussed it an I relayed our feeling to you. You blog, therefore I comment. And I'm sure I feed my ego with some of my comments to you and other bloggers.

We share opinions and the world keeps spinning.

You have a good website and good blog. So I return and you make money.

I don't think I criticize you unfairly just to be mean. If you awake me with a post then I respond with my feeling. You have stated it bugs you when people criticize you or state your website is ugly. That I find truly amazing you let that bug you. You make plenty of money and are successful. But you are type A personality and will strive to be number one and then you will arrive and still be discontented (my ego feeling.)

You say to be successful find someone that is successful and learn from them. So I am here learning, but also interacting in my way. I also am aware that you have a psychology degree and you might be playing me like a fiddle.

But either way I enjoy you and others thoughts.

Count your blessings,


Thank you for the link to the site dedicated to Anthony de Mello.
After watching several videos in the awareness series, they all look to be very good.


I am just the messenger, I will again thank David for pointing out this man of clarity in the midst of chaos.

@ AsiaBill - Yes, the nature of so called 'backpacking' has change dramatically over the last 10 - 15 years. Take for example the Lonely Planet guides - they stopped being for budget backpackers years ago. Some of these kids have 100 dollars a day - i mean thats like 2 weeks money for me !!

As for Andy and a 'provoking' writing style. Well, the whole site is about selling his personality, and works well. Its just a shame that now i have to go hunting for the link to find the blog nowadays - Newcomers to the site may never get that far!

Dave, you said,
"shame that now i have to go hunting for the link to find the blog nowadays"

I am confused, the link to the Travel Blog on every page: Click on the Hobo Graphic that says BLOG. I then have the link Journal on every pages of the site in the exact same location. This is about a plastered on the site as I can be, short of coming and helping you to click.

The sitelinks could be better, but the name of the blog has never changed. I am thinking of just calling it writings by Andy Graham.

Tell me where would be better, I am all ears. We even have it in the RSS feeds again, even though I do not recommend this for Traveler. (Use Google Reader if you do.)

I think you do not read, you are frustrated with life, more than you read, better to subscribe and not get yourself confused.

I want older people, say over 40 to subscribe, they are the best readers, they have some humility and do not just jump the way the younger techheads do. This is why I am promoting subscribe, plus, they have the money and do not have any sense of pride in say, I do not click on Ads, they click on what is good for them.

i do my best to keep the techies off the site, I annoy them when possible. They believe they are clever, become the king of trolls.

I subscribe by email to page I want to read, I must if I want to read in Haiti offline, because RSS feed is not good for travelers.

I just subscribed to Scientific American, I do not like to read Travel stuff, too boring, I guess I live it too much.

I put the word Journal on the site, because I know Google is smart. They are going to put all the Wordpress Blogs at the lowest rank possible soon. I cannot use the word Blog too much in good SEO cousious.

Search Engine Optimization. I do not answer to Readers, but I do answer to Google, this is a horrible feeling. I daily must shore up the pages to make them stay out of the supplemental and google goes corporate to the n-th degree.

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