"Cancer victims who don't accept their fate, who don't learn to live with it, will only destroy what little time they have left."
- Ingrid Bergman
My Father has prostate cancer that spread to his back, one of my best friends has lung cancer. This friend would be one of the three that would stand with me if I ever get married, he is important to me.
What can I do?
I try my best to listen, and to be grateful, thankful, and to give strength and hope. We are all going to die, that is guaranteed.
Cancer stops procrastination, cancer is not going to stop. I am here with my parents visiting, and the question came up, should I go see my friend?
--- Yes, because tomorrow is never guaranteed.
My friend told me,
"It has been inactive since September."
This was good news.
My father is waiting for treatment in Indianapolis, we hope he is accepted into the program.
Acceptance and gratitude, two signs of faith.
PhillyLinda from has written 2 comments
Take one step at a time through this journey.
You have my card if you need me.
phil from has written 74 comments
That's good advice Linda.
There are also many good books on near death experiences, some written by medical doctors, you can search them on Google or Amazon. Death seems to be well attended so to speak, and a very pleasant experience for most of those who survived to tell about it, especially for the kind people among us.. and it seems for many if not most others as well.
I was with my mother the day before she passed. She had tended to hold grudges in her life. She was unable to talk, or lift her head. I held her hand and told her that if she could spot a person that had done her wrong, and forgive them that she might be better off when she passed...
so we recalled all the people in her life. silently I don't know who each was, one at a time, and I coached her through each one when she grimaced and seemed not able to forgive them... she squeezed my hand each time she forgave another of them... until finally, she raised her head, turned and looked at me in the eyes. she had not been up that in years... with tears streaming down her face and squeezed my hand for a very long time.
She passed the next day...in peace Id be willing to wager.
that was her path, it was an adlib from me, just a hunch..... a person can tell what needs to be done .. or nothing.
I was with the world famous Jack Gordon, car racer, a few days before he died at age 89... he was lucid to the end. I asked him what advice he had for other race car drivers and motorcycle racers.. and he said, 'learn to run the course perfectly with no errors, in perfect control... that way you learn perfection....go as slowly as you have to, but run the course perfectly....and do not race or respond to the other men on the track.. just keep the fastest line that you have discovered, let them pass you if they can, do not change anything..."
when you push it to limits, you are by definition riding out of control, thats much slower.
Thats what Jack told me.
When I was maybe two or three, we lived in Elko nevada, a ways from some tiny mining shacks built on skids, sitting on bare ground, no grass, maybe a tree here and there.. sage brush covered the distance....with no paint on them, just dried out clap board sides and tar paper roofs..
I stopped in front of one of them a weathered and very old indian woman came out, I can recall looking at her knee caps. I could see the single light bulb hanging from the ceiling in the darkened room behind her... and she asked my name and said she was going to tell me something that she hoped I would never forget...
"Remember this, never harm a good man"...and handed me a piece of natural turquoise that looked like a cloud, and had a nearly flat turquoise bottom. It was formed that way, not broken off of a larger chunk. the size of ones thumb.
Some of us have something to say before we die, some of us do not... some say just one or two words.... just as they pass, like Steve Jobs who said.. 'Wow Wow' in total amazement as he gazed off into space and departed this earth.
Most of those who have died and been revived to live again, say they do not fear death, or even look forward to it. I think most of us need to feel we have completed what we came here for. then we let go easily.
Dr Raymond Moody, pediatrician, was the first MD to write a book on the subject in order to disprove the phenomena.
Motorcycle Bob from has written 85 comments
Acceptance of the things you cannot change may be the only way. I currently have my Girfriends father living in our den, Alzheimers, Prostate cancer, bone cancer and various infections. My GF has had breast cancer twice in the 14 years together, and currently has bone, esophogas and stomach cancer. I won't list the long people close to me that have had cancer, some survived, some not. This kind of thing seems to happen more and more often as we get older and our family and freinds age with us.
The only thing that you really can do is try to be there for them and to live your life as well as you can.
I will keep you in my thoughts. I wish you the best.