Sadistic Hobo in Poland

Sadistic Hobo in Poland

I am being the Sadistic Hobo in Poland.

I am having fun by being a little cruel; this is the technical definition of being Sadistic:
: the gaining of pleasure from causing physical or mental pain to people or animals (2)

There is this stream of people walking down the sidewalks this morning in Augustow, Poland there are many families, and many single old women. It is an interesting procession of people that appear to be quite properly dressed.

The time is about 8:10 AM in the morning and I am making my daily run to the corner market to buy a couple whole-wheat rolls, coated with small sesame seeds, other grains and mixed perfectly to a crunchy coating. I have become addicted to this special little bread form here in Poland. I am sad to say on this Sunday, there only have white-bread rolls, however are full of that yummy yeast like flavor.

Ok, how am I being sadistic?

I am deriving great pleasure in making the people of Poland, plus Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania, Germany and most of the European nations nervous. I like to make them fidget, squirm and feel uneasy with me, I am having great fun doing this.

How to be Sadistic in Europe?

1. As you approach people look them in the Eyes and take on a happy expression, like how are you, as best you and say this with your eyes.

2. Nod your head, this rather requires they are looking at you; sometime you need to work hard to get their attention.

3. Bow at the waist just a little, this is more Asian, however the roots of Europe go back a long way to Kings and Queens, when they had the curtsey or bowing before the Noble Class, so these people get the idea. No need for a full on bow, they could have a heart attack.

NOTE: PLEASE I am trying to show you or teach you how to be a little Sadistic, not how to be outrageously cruel. Have some limits here and do not use this advice to extreme measures. It is only for small good fun and at the cost of the mental pain of our European Neighbors. Do not demand, push, or become angry in this process.

4. Say,
“Hello, how are you”
In English…

Now if you know the local language better, if you can say Hello in the Polish language or any of the European language this is better, and maybe a little less cruel

OK… Figured it out yet?

I was walking to the store, when I encountered many people walking to the local Catholic Church, the bells had rang and the people were going to Sunday services.

As I encountered these groups, as is customary among my specific Indiana culture to acknowledge the presence of other, I perform my normal greeting of other animals on the planet.

I have to avoid giving them the Thai Y or the Arabic pulling at the chest with their hand, however I find I often do all of these greeting in Unison, and try to get away with the kiss thing of France or Holland if possible on occasions.

Why is it Sadistic?

I am teasing the people, it is not normal for people to say Hello, like saying Hello to a person from New York City, they will think, and what does this person want. Therefore, they get suspicious, a little fearful, and look at you, sometimes like what is wrong with you.

I think it may be less sadistic to say Hello, in English as some of them do stutter around more as they then know that another culture has entered their world and if they have studied English there may be a delay and then… they say,

“Fine, thank you.”

In the Bible it says to be like clever like a wolf, but behave like a sheep, I am moralizing in a way and trying to teach you a lesson. I have people voraciously feel guilty and write me real nasty letters when I do things like this, however I am writing my journal with you looking over my shoulders, so I am having fun…. I am thinking out-loud this really helps me to take these abstract feeling and put them into real understanding of cultures.

I am being a little slick, trying to encourage you to say hello to your fellow animal along the path, this is my greatest tip, my greatest benefit of coming from my family. The concept of caring for the people around me. Thanks to Mom and Dad for this, and the way of life they gave me.

Sub-note: Faith is the absence of fear. To be afraid to say hello to another person is to believe or to lack Faith that you are really safe and ok.

If you really want to know some more obnoxious ways of annoying other cultures go here:

Cultural Manners


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I come from the certain type of church background where you would probably be seen as quite normal and cordial...

There is a guy at my church who hugs people to make them uncomfortable. It's what he does. If people try to pull away too quickly, he kisses their ear... He will do this to men and women, old and young. It is quite amusing tto watch people squirm... but a hug can be invasive of people's boundaries so not useful for the hobo traveler I would imagine... you could get killed for doing that to the wrong people.

Andy, I completely understand your quest to acknowledge people in your world around you. When I was kid growing up in my little town of Luebeck the man would great a woman by slightly lifting their hats for a moment and slightly bowing and saying Guten Tag.

Here in California now it appears to be less and less common to greet the people you encounter. I used to train myslef to be present for people coming my way and to greet them and smile at them. It is very hard to keep this up when everybody just wants to ignore you.

Andy, thanks for the reminder to care for people around you.

Dear Sadistic Hobo,

You are saying what I have known about you all along. Funny (funny haha or funny peculiar???). Where I live in Idaho...well you have to wave or talk to EVERYONE you meet or risk the fisheye. Of course a double-date is considered to be 2 guys in a truck with a gun rack and a couple dogs. Sometimes beer. Sometimes for the dogs.

Give'em hell you sadistic animal.

When walking home from work the other day I waited for the lights to change so that I could cross the road. The man standing next to me turned to me, smiled and asked me how I was. When the lights changed he crossed the road and said "Have a nice evening". As I continued on my path I started to question what the man wanted from me and why he would talk to me like that.

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